Saturday, August 14, 2004 :::
"A group known as the League of Human Dignity helped arrange for Deuel to be driven to a local livestock scale, where he could be weighed."
::: at 2:50 PM
Friday, August 13, 2004 :::
You know all those monkeys at the typewriters?
Today I am their motivational speaker.
Today I am Tony Robbins.
Today I am Tony Robbins and I have monkey shit on my face.
His name is Tony Robbins...right?
Disclaimer: I wrote Tim Robbins the entire time. But for once I was proactive enough to actually open a new window and google the fuckwad.
::: at 4:07 PM
Wednesday, August 11, 2004 :::
Bloggers are really fucking weird.
I mean really, it wasn't a some tawdry affair - We're ENGAGED!!!
::: at 1:41 PM
Tuesday, August 10, 2004 :::
Runtboy Is Dairyqueen!
I just jacked both my knees and was forced by a friend to let him buy me groceries so we wandered around the cruiseteria-mart and I obsessed over canned goods and someones husband.
Usefull Advice: When coming on to someones husband, jam your face full of wasabi rice crackers and start sweating prefusely and choke a little from all the wasabi and maybee spit a few half chewed bits out. Then when he's all hot and bothered try to regain composure by pathetically trying to play up your absolute retardedness as a little light hearted self effacing fun.
Keep trying for for, like, 25 years trying to convince yourself a little more each time
::: at 2:54 PM